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How can I generate and transmit sexual energy as an attractant?

Getting to the core of you

Yes! It's time to relight your fire. What if you think it's never been lit. Oh yes it has. It was sparking once ready to roar into action and light up the world. When you were a tiny child, before you were filled full of toxic stories that dulled you like a piece of tarnished silver, you shone as only you can. You resonated your tune in harmony with the world. The good news is that like silver that has dulled, the tarnish can be removed to reveal the true beauty beneath - you, as you once were and can still be.

First and foremost it's useful and important to understand and accept that you are a sexual being. If you balk at that idea, how about trying it on just for now. You might like it! Your levels of desire and attitudes to sexuality may be very different to many other people. We have all been subject to stories of some kind that have tarnished our shining sexuality. Each person carries his or her portfolio of stories like dust that clogs the pores and impedes the smooth flow in you.

Let flow your fantasies and desires

You've had sexual desires and needs and sometimes you've fulfilled them either with yourself, or with a partner/s or in some dream or fantasy. These desires are part of your individual make up. There are only a few criteria that any desire or act must fulfill before it is acceptable.

1. It must not harm anyone against their will

2. It must be agreeable to all parties involved

3. It should be safe

4. If with another party, that party should be another human being over the age of consent. [i.e. sex with animals is not good, it's dangerous and not fair on the animal - animal sex should only take place in your fantasies]

Think about it... whatever you want is OK. And what you can't have with someone else, you can have in your dreams and fantasies if that quells the desire. You just have to indulge it or find a willing partner to indulge it with you.

Maurice came on my flirting workshop and learnt that it was OK to be into fetish. He went to a club, made new friends and now he has a girlfriend who is into the same sexual scene as he is. Great!

So, now that you know it's OK. You can let rip.

How to generate sexual energy

1.    Lie down, sit or stand - it only matters that you are comfortable

2.    Locate your hara point and focus your attention on it. Relax and inhale and exhale a few times until your breathing is slow and regular. Just let it happen.

3.    Close your eyes if you wish.

4.    Begin to think of the ultimate sexual fantasy that turns you on. If necessary, watch the porn, read the book, think the thoughts you need to in order to get the fantasy going

5.    Notice where the feelings are in your body. Breathe as if you are moving those feelings up the front of your spine through the middle of your body, wafting past your heart and to the top of your head. As you breathe out, imagine the energy waving back down over the top of your head, down through the back of your spine to the hara point.

6.    Loop the feelings round and round, while still maintaining the fantasy. Don't attempt to masturbate at this time. This is not about trying to reach orgasm. Just allow the sexual feelings to move around your body. Notice as they subside and continue to breathe.

7.    Relax.

8.    Do this again, and again. What you are doing is generating sexual energy, but not using it to create orgasm. This energy is very empowering. The more you generate it on a daily basis, the more juiced up you are going to be for life.

9.    If you feel so turned on that you have to do more, then practise what my friend Guy calls stop- start wanking / masturbating. Bring yourself to the brink as many times as possible, breathe the energy round your body and continue like this for as long as you are revelling in the great feelings.

10.    Good.. this is very very good for you...you are building up your sexual energy... and it can be used for all sorts of wonderful things...                                   

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